Rocks & Stumbling Blocks

Jed and I had time to kill Sunday before church and it was an incredible 70 degrees outside, so we decided to play at the playground just outside where we have our Children's Ministry. Scattered on the 15-20 foot walkway were a handful of rocks that had been tracked out from the playground. As we were walking, I could not get Jed to follow me to the playground because he was so interested in every little rock he saw. I kept trying to tell him, "Jed, look ahead! There are all kinds of rocks up there at the playground!" I'd take one from his hand and attempt to lead him further down the sidewalk, but nope, he'd stop short of the 'rock promised land' because he'd spot another little rock that he just had to have. It must have taken us at least 15 minutes to make it those few feet...

So how often do I delay good things that God has for me because I'm grasping at every little thing that I think will make me happy? I'm stubborn and I think that I'd better reach out for and hold tight to what's right here in front of me...what I can see...what I can trust in...

I can't blame Jed for not understanding, but I'm definitely at fault for not trusting God as He is trying to lead me. As we journey on in pursuit of planting a church and all that it entails, I am so afraid to let go of the provisions God has made for us here in Arkansas. I struggle to believe that what he's leading me to is better than what I'm holding tight to. And what I'm holding tight to hasn't really even been 'much to write home about'. But it's what I can see...and what I can reach on my own.

Now I see something else though... I see the error of my ways. And, I see God trying to get me to put my trust in him, and my hand in his, as he leads me to the place he's chosen to take me. I don't expect a 'provision promised land' necessarily. I do expect provision though... I'm just learning that I can't begin to imagine what that will look like. Just like Jed couldn't picture the place that I was leading him...